So, let me talk to the men for a moment. Since your wife’s body, soul and spirit are so sacred the Lord desires that you to be in awe of your wife just as you do the Lord. You were given an awesome responsibility to care for your wife, to protect her and be a spiritual covering by protecting, praying for her and your children.
“Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her, so that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, that He might present to Himself the church in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that she would be holy and blameless” (Ephesians 5:25-27).
In the Presence of a Queen
Husband’s you’ve been given the awesome responsibility to give yourself up for, sanctify, and cleanse her with the water of the word so that she is holy and blameless. The husband is responsible for ensuring his wife’s heart, his home and especially the couple’s bedroom are filled with love. In our counseling office, we teach husbands how to treat his wife with dignity, speaking forth the truth of God’s word and praying it over her, which encourages and blesses her.
One way we do this is by rebuking any lies she believes and speaking the truth. For example, if she says something about herself that is derogatory like, “I’m so fat and ugly,” the husband would then pray, “In Jesus’ name, I rebuke that lie. The truth is you’re gorgeous no matter what weight you are.”
Then there are the practical things that gentlemen do to treat their special ladies as if they are in the presence of a queen. This fine art has been lost in this day and age but a husband conveys his love, adoration, and cherishing of her by standing up when she enters the room, pulling out her chair for her, not swearing, opening doors for her, putting her coat on for her, driving peacefully and responsible for her, never letting the children disrespect her, carry things for her, walk on the outside of the street, offer his arm or hand when she needs support, pamper her with praise and gifts, and walk on the outside. Unfortunately, this falls to the wayside the longer a couple has been married.
Always A Bride
When we got home after our honeymoon our family was there to greet us and Bill began unpacking the car and bringing the luggage inside. In jest, my aunt chided me, “The honeymoons over Janean, pick up your own bags and bring them inside.” Bill immediately protested, “My wife will never carry her own bags as long as I’m alive.” To his credit, he has kept his word to this day.
Wouldn’t it be wonderful if every Christian man was taught that a woman is sacred, and she needs to be treated with dignity? Her body is God’s tabernacle as yours is. Unfortunately, many men need to be reminded to be gentlemen. To say this gently, a woman’s olfactory sense is much more perceptive than his. We can’t tell you how many times wives have told us that they’ve lost the desire for lovemaking because her husband emits body odors or sounds that assault her senses and her worth.
God’s Design For A Husband
God’s design is that the husband says to his new bride on their wedding night, “I’ve been faithful to you all my life, even before I met you while waiting for this glorious time when I could become one flesh with you. I have not defrauded you or any other woman. Don’t be careless with the sacred, holy, and life-giving woman you were given or will be given in the future. Nothing softens a woman’s heart more than being in the presence of a godly gentleman.
Gandolph the Majestic
We have two geese now but formerly we had three. Gandolph the gander is a majestic, all white Embden goose who lost his first mate Lily within a year of their birth because of a birth defect. After she was gone, he wandered around calling out to her and slept in her crate where we were trying to nurse her back to health. He needed a new bride desperately, especially when he realized she wasn’t coming back. He got so distraught that he became obsessed looking at himself in a mirror all day.
We searched high and low to find a female who was around his age, but all we could find was another pair who were already mates: James and Lucie. We figured it would be better to have him closer to being in a gaggle of geese than to be all alone. They would hang out together and be joined at the wing. Gandolph was the outsider. Strangely, James began to get insecure around Gandolph and began attacking him and even his Lucie. We observed that Gandolph exhibited a quiet strength. He never started any fights, but when James picked a fight with him or went after Lucie he never backed down. We noticed one day that Lucie began following Gandolph around and chasing James off. Suddenly poor James was the odd gander out. He would stand up on the hill looking down at Gandolph and Lucie together. Of course, that broke our hearts so we found him a new home where he could find a new mate with lots of other birds.
Now Lucie never leaves Gandolph’s side as if her life depended on it. The interesting thing is that whenever there is danger near he stands in front of her, spreads his wings and hisses running the culprit off (namely our golden retriever Theo who’d never hurt a fly). She trusts Gandolph completely to be her protector. I can imagine how fierce he’ll be when she starts laying eggs and nesting.
A Man’s Calling
There’s something organically true about how God created male and female. This is your calling as masculine soul to be a protector for her and your family.
It’s been said that women are innately drawn to men who have a strong sense of confidence (like the bad boys who they wrongly assume are confident) and this type of man is a real turn on. Of course, a Christian husband reveals the quiet strength of Christ, who is a servant, lover and strong. In other words, he doesn’t get his identity from sex, women, or his wife.
Men Surprise Your Wife with the “Divine Desire Protocol” and Start Making Love God’s Way
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