“I’ve Had Sex and Jesus Still Loves Me!”

Bachelorette Hannah B. and Luke P. Disagree About Sex Before Marriage

The most talked about event in the 15 years of Bachelor and Bachelorette history happened during the fantasy suite episode between Hannah Brown and Luke. Hannah’s declaration that “I’ve had sex before marriage and Jesus still loves me has gone viral. Viewers have taken sides. Some taking Hannah’s side saying she was a strong, independent and fierce woman. Others have taken Luke’s side saying he was courageous, stood up for Christian values, and deserving of so much more than Hannah.

Luke claimed to be a Christian throughout the show. He confessed to Hannah that he is a born-again virgin, which means he had a very colorful sexual past but after receiving the Lord he recommitted his sexuality to the Lord and now wants to remain abstinent till marriage. He’s been a controversial bachelor this season for many reasons: he’s extremely naive, doesn’t have a clue how he comes across to others, doesn’t understand boundaries and he’s constantly putting his foot in his mouth, and he professed his love for Hannah when he didn’t even know her.

Is Hannah a Christian?

Hannah said she kept him around because after she literally kissed all the bachelors she claimed that he was the best kisser, and they had a connection. The camera picks up her praying to Jesus under her breath on the first episode. She talks about being a Christian but confusingly she makes out with all the guys (even in horizontal sexual positions and mounting them) in every episode and went on a date bungee jumping in the nude. By the fantasy suite week, you can pretty much conclude that she’ll be having sex, but you dare to hope that she might draw the line and actually follow the Bible’s teaching on sex before marriage.

But alas, the episode opens with her saying she’s excited about growing her relationship with the guys physically on the fantasy suite dates. She claims to hold sexual intimacy dear to her heart where her body is joined with his body. Hmmm . . . sounds very Christian, but wait, they’re not married!

Luke Chirps, “Let’s Talk About Sex.”

She’s already slept with two of the bachelors in the overnight fantasy suites and then along comes her date with Luke where he brings up the fantasy suite and wants to talk about sexual expectations. He says sex is a beautiful and incredible thing only when it’s in the guidelines of marriage. He reiterates that he’s saving himself for marriage and he wants to make sure they’re on the same page with morals. He makes reference to past contestants who have proclaimed their faith and yet have no problem having sex before marriage in the fantasy suites. Then he gets in dangerous territory when he tells Hannah, “That’s not something you should be doing and I just want to make sure that you’re not going to be sexually intimate with, ya know, with the other relationships here. If you told me you had sex with one or multiple guys, I’d wanna go home. If you’re not having sex with the other guys, I’d like to continue the relationship and move on.”

Hannah Goes on a Tirade

At first Hannah’s face is looking like she’s feeling convicted but at this point, she gets offended. She doesn’t admit to having sex with two of the bachelors just yet, but admits to having sex with only two guys in her past who she thought would be her husband (minimizing her sin). Then she gets mad and tells him he doesn’t have the right to ask her those questions because he’s not her husband (shaming him).

He can’t ask her about sex because he’s not her husband, but she’s clearly had sex with two of the guys who aren’t her husband. LOL! Hannah’s saying it’s horrible to ask about sex, but not to have sex? Then she says, “Sex outside of marriage may be a sin, but so is pride!” She’s attacking him now and justifying her own behaviors. She points out all his failures, telling him she could’ve gotten rid of him earlier (rejection), claims that’s it’s all about sex for him (huh? Sounds like hypocrisy), starts using foul language and says, “Bleep you dude!” She hasn’t let him talk and she’s on a tirade. She continues that she’s a grown woman and she can make her own decisions, and he doesn’t get to make decisions about how he’s going to move forward with her (more rejection).

Sadly, Hannah’s True Colors are Showing

But here’s the clincher! She brings up the biblical story of the adulterous woman and tells him he’s throwing the first stone with his judgment (leaving out that Jesus said to the woman go and sin no more). She knows she has God in her heart, and she is light (uh oh). Then she tells him to leave and when he hesitates, she says, “I can get you to go!” Laughing she taunts him saying, “Yeah, I’ve had sex! They cut to her interview where she unbecomingly says she “bleeped” in a windmill and even did it twice “winking” to the camera. She flips him off as he’s being driven away saying he’s not going to tell me what I can or can’t do. She answers to the Lord, and she doesn’t answer to Luke.

Our Question for Hannah

Did you ask the Lord about having sex in the windmill twice before marriage? It doesn’t appear she did since she says she kinda fell into it. In other words, it wasn’t premeditated. But before the overnight dates, she says she can’t wait to grow her relationships with the men physically so I guess it was premeditated.

Hannah Doesn’t Know Her Bible!

Here’s a shocker! According to the Bible having sex with your girlfriend or boyfriend when you’re not married is not called dating it’s called fornication. If you’re a Christian and you believe the Bible to be God’s inerrant word, you’re gonna go to the Bible and find out what God says about sex before marriage. Obviously, Hannah doesn’t know her Bible and neither do many Christians who are having sex outside of marriage.

What’s Does the Bible Say About Sexual Sin?

What does the Bible say about sexual sin? Believe it or not many Christians don’t know, and some seemingly don’t want to know what sexual sin is because it might interfere with their sexual behaviors, self-pleasure, and carnal desires. We’ve heard, and vehemently object to:

1. It’s okay to have sex if you’re in a committed relationship,
2. It’s okay to live with your boyfriend/girlfriend or fiancé before marriage,
3. And finally, the one that Hannah proclaims on the Bachelorette; it’s okay to have sex before marriage because God will forgive you.

You might expect these kinds of remarks from a hedonist secular society; one who has rejected God, but it’s alarming to hear them from people who claim to be Christ-followers. The definition of hedonism can be twofold:

One, seeking pleasure through a devotion, especially a self-indulgent one, to pleasure and happiness as a way of life, and

Two, a philosophy of pleasure through a doctrine that holds that pleasure is the highest good or the source of moral values.

The synonyms for hedonism are debauchery, depravity, immorality, licentious, pleasure-seeking, self-satisfaction, self-gratification, and in our context doing whatever you want sexually.

Therefore, the task at hand is to determine what you believe. Do you believe God’s Word or a secular hedonistic world-view? Don’t be too hasty to answer! We always say believe behaviors, not words! In other words, if you say you’re a Christian but are acting otherwise, it’s suspicious to us. At the very least, they believe in Jesus but they’re slandering Him, and at worst, they aren’t really Christians at all.

Let’s look at what the Bible says about sexual sin. Simply put sex inside the marriage covenant is a beautiful gift from God; while sex outside of a marriage covenant is a sin.

What in the World is Porneia?

Strong’s Concordance (like a Bible dictionary) uses the Greek word “Porneia” for sexual sin or sinful expressions of sexuality. Porneia is defined as any and all kinds of sexual behavior outside the context of marriage and is commonly translated as fornication and/or sexual immorality. Scriptures are absolutely clear in the prohibition of porneia. It’s called evil, improper, sinful, fleshly, earthly and against the will of God. Those who continually and unrepentantly practice it are declared guilty and unrighteous and will be subject to judgment by God. Given the clear condemnation of the Scriptures, we would do well to ask what exactly constitutes sexual sin.

“Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. And such were some of you. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God”(1 Corinthians 6:9–11).

The following are Biblical definitions of sexual sin which we believe fall into categories:

Carnal Flesh

Carnal Flesh (deeds of the flesh, including sexual immorality which is opposed to spirit life)

“Now the deeds of the flesh are evident, which are: immorality, impurity, sensuality,idolatry, sorcery, enmities, strife, jealousy, outbursts of anger, disputes, dissensions, factions, envying, drunkenness, carousing, and things like these, of which I forewarn you, just as I have forewarned you, that those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God” (Galatians 5:19-22).

Fornication

Fornication (any sex outside of marriage covenant)

“Flee from sexual immorality (fornication, KJV). Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body” (1 Corinthians 6:18).

Idolatry

Idolatry (worshiping anything including sex before worshiping God)

“Put to death therefore what is earthly (carnal, fleshly) in you: sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry” (Col 3:5).

“But as for the cowardly, the faithless, the detestable, as for murderers, the sexually immoral, sorcerers, idolaters, and all liars, their portion will be in the lake that burns with fire and sulfur, which is the second death” (Revelation 21:8, ESV).

Premarital Sex

Premarital sex (sex before marriage)

“But if they can’t control themselves, they should go ahead and marry. It’s better to marry than to burn with lust” (1 Corinthians 7:9).

“But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband” (1 Corinthians 7:2).

“But sexual immorality and all impurity or covetousness must not even be named among you, as is proper among saints” (Ephesians 5:3).

Sensuality

Sensuality (enjoying the sexual pleasures of the carnal or fleshly senses)

“Having lost all sensitivity, they have given themselves over to sensuality so as to indulge in every kind of impurity, with a continual lust for more” (Ephesians 4:19). 

“Let us walk properly as in the daytime, not in orgies and drunkenness, not in sexual immorality and sensuality, not in quarreling and jealousy” (Rom 13:13).

Lustful Passions

Lustful Passions (objectifying someone by having sex in your mind or thoughts, intense or overpowering emotions and sexual cravings — addictions)

“God’s will is for you to be holy, so stay away from all sexual sin. Then each of you will control his own body and live in holiness and honor — not in lustful passion like the pagans who do not know God and his ways. Never harm or cheat a Christian brother in this matter by violating his wife, for the Lord avenges all such sins, as we have solemnly warned you before. God has called us to live holy lives, not impure lives”
(1 Thessalonians 4:3–7, NLT)

Make No Mistake

It’s evident that God’s Holy Word states clear doctrinal teaching in both the Old and New Testaments regarding sexual sin. You may think that it does not, and you have a right to your opinion or beliefs, but DO NOT say that the Bible teaches it’s okay to have sex outside of marriage. If you’re a hedonist you might won’t understand, but if you’re a Christian there’s no excuse.

Are You a Hedonist or a Bible Believing Christian?

If you don’t believe what God says about sexual sin then you can’t repent and be forgiven. You’ll continue walking in sin out of ignorance, the enemy’s deception, false teachings or just plain rebellion.

God’s Love, Forgiveness and Judgement!

Let’s be very clear, God is all about love, forgiveness, and redemption. Jesus came to save mankind from their sin and death not to judge them. Sexual sin doesn’t send a person to hell or separate a born-again Christian from God’s love. There is only one unforgivable sin, blaspheming the Holy Spirit – rejecting Jesus Christ thus denying God plan of redemption. But make no mistake, Jesus is coming back very soon! This time He’ll administer God’s wrath on an unbelieving world who have rejected Him.

The fact that sexual immorality is sinful should not lead to despair, but rather hope. The God who envisioned and created sex is for sex, of course, within the parameters of marriage. The God who calls you to flee from sexual immorality has given you legs to run away from sin and a heart to run toward Jesus and believe in Him.

https://www.christianintimacyexperts.com/intimacy/spiritual/naked-unashamed/